Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Let's Play....THE FEUD

In less then a week of being live, The Gust has gotten itself in the middle of a feud. Some "blog" called "The Breeze" has decided to take on The Gust...why..I'm not sure. What I do know is that this is going to get ugly.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Weathermen have no nipples



I would like to share with you the little known fact that weathermen do not have nipples (weatherwomen have one nipple the size of a ripe grapefruit in the center of their chest). The lack of nips forces them to rely on their computer models instead of the natural instincts the rest of society uses (Hard nips = wear a coat, Firm nips = lite coat/heavy shirt, Sweaty Nips=no coat). The weatherman community does not take kind to outsiders. Just last year a man attempted to join this weak fraternity by slicing off his nips but he was quickly discovered and beaten to death. The moral of this story is the next time you see your local weatherman acting like an a-hole at your local supermarket stick to beating him instead of a purple nurple.



(outsider on his way to try and become a weatherman)



Artist renderings of a weatherman & weatherwoman

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Have you seen this boy?

-Have you seen this boy? The MTF is officially missing and is leaving a trail of destruction behind him. Rumors are swirling that he is breaking promises, hearts and hymens all around the country. Where is he? Nobody knows for sure. Let's take a look at what we do know...
1-He promised breeze updates daily for the month of April. So far, he is batting under .500. In the forecasting business 50% might be all star material but in the friend business it is horrible.
2-He has a list of phone calls that he has yet to return. Coming from one of the most notorious voicemail leavers this is unacceptable.
3-He made promises of email updates on two separate occasions and failed to come thru either time.
4-He hates the city/village of Schaumburg
5-He eats poop

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